Escaping Alcatraz
by Just Some NJ Writer
Summary: Realizing that her father might have evil intentions, Samantha Maxis decides to get help from the Mob of the Dead crew! Giving instructions out threw Weasel, she hatches a plan to bring the four back to life! Will they make it? Or will Sal, Billy, and Finn just think Weasel's crazy? Rated T for cursing/blood and gore.
1. Our Possible Saviors?

**Hello everyone! Just Some NJ Writer here! Welcome to Escaping Alcatraz! This story is part of my CoD Zombies series. If you want to read this series, Check out "Zombie Vegas" and "The Abandoned Brewery" (just make sure you read "Zombie Vegas" before "The Abandoned Brewery" the latter of the two stories is the sequel to the first). Anyway, let's get started!**

* * *

Escaping Alcatraz

Chapter 1

Our Possible Saviors?

* * *

_In the Aether dimension_

Samantha Maxis was writing in her diary. She wrote:

_Dear Diary,_

_I am having so much fun playing with Eddy and the other three! I just wish for once that I could win! Then again, the fun would stop. I know though that I must wind up killing them at some point, and I don't want to disobey Daddy, but…I'm having fun! Oh yeah there is also this author guy that threatened to kill me, but I'm not that scared of him. We've actually become friends. Sure, we fight a whole lot about how the four should do things, but we get along just fine. He even gave me new ideas for perks and weapons and other things!_

_Speaking of Daddy, he found away to speak to me! Something about being digitalized in the Moon or something. The thing was, though. He didn't sound like Daddy at all. He wouldn't stop talking to me about how he will rule the Aether and the world and make Eddy pay. He is being driven by vengeance. I fear he has become somewhat evil! I hear that four mobsters that died have been fighting zombies endlessly in Purgatory since the 1930s! They may be the world's only hope! I have to bring them back to life. They are the only hope for the world!_

_Also, I made a bakery in the Aether that sells my favorite pastries! It has been so long since I've had a good donut!_

Samantha finished writing and closed her diary. She then contacted one of the mobsters. She chose the nicest, the one with the most pure heart (it doesn't mean his heart was pure, just purer than the others)

* * *

_In Purgatory_

Michael "Finn" O'Leary, Salvatore "Sal" DeLuca, Billy Handsome, and Albert "The Weasel" Arlington have finally finished building Weasel's makeshift plane "Icarus" on the top of Alcatraz prison.

"Like Icarus, we take flight!" Weasel said proudly as he started up the plane.

"I gotta say, Weasel. If this works I'll be impressed." Sal said. The other two agreed. Secretly, though, the three were planning to kill Weasel as soon as they landed.

Icarus took off and flew gracefully away from the prison. It was storming and Weasel was having trouble piloting it, though. He could just barely see the Golden Gate Bridge before they crashed into it. They fell hard. They got up. Weasel spoke.

"Shit. Sorry, guys. At least we're finally out of there. No more freaking zombies. Huhhuh. Why are you guys looking at me like that?" Sal was grinning, Finn was smirking, and Billy was laughing maliciously. They pulled out their weapons. "G-Guys! W-What are y-you doing!?" They fired. Weasel instantly fell to the ground, bleeding. "Why?...After all this shit...why?" He blacked out to the three of them laughing.

He woke up shortly after, like every time that happened. He never could remember exactly what happened. This time, though, was different. When got up he heard a voice. It was a little German girl's voice. "Mister Arlington? Can you hear me?"

"What? Who said that?"

"Who said what, Weasel?" Finn asked.

"N-Nothing. Never mind." They all took a window. Weasel was in the library with Billy. He took the window closest to the door, while Billy took the one to the right.

"Mister Arlington listen to me! My name is Samantha. I'm going to tell you how to get out of here."

"We already have a plan, whoever you are. I'm a criminal and I sure as hell not taking advice from a little girl." Billy looked at him, then looked a way and muttered "Al's finally snapped."

"Look, Icarus vill not vork. You have to follow my instructions if you ever vant to leave here. Do you trust me?"

"I'm going insane."

"Please. Zhe fate of Zhe vorld depends on it."

"Okay, fine. What do I do?" He said. He knew that one day he would go insane. He knew one day he would hear voices in his head. He just never thought the voice would be a little German girl's, though.

**That is the first chapter, folks! Did you like it? If you did, could you maybe, oh, I don't know…review, favorite and follow? Please? Man, I'm pathetic…**


	2. What do I do?

**Just to clear a few questions before they're asked. Unfortunately, there will be no new weapons, zombies, perks, elements, etc in this story. On the bright side, the next one will! Also, I don't know if any of you noticed (probably not) but I based the Weasel/Samantha relationship on Stuhlinger/Richtofen with minor tweaks. Anyway, let's get to chapter two!**

Escaping Alcatraz

Chapter 2

What do I do?

"First," Samantha said, "you must feed Cerberus's heads six zombies each."

"Why?" Weasel said.

"You vill be able to get a throwable tomahawk zhat can easily cut down zombies and it alvays comes back."

"Fine. Where are these heads?"

"Zhe jail cell block to your right is zhe first. I vill contact again vhen your done."

"Okay."

"Guys! I'm opening up the doors!" Sal yelled. The doors opened and Weasel went to the cell block like he was told. Finn went with him. Weasel saw a red wolf's head drawn on a wall.

"Finn, I think when we kill zombies next to that head *points to wolf's head*, I think something might happen. Finn shrugged. He then killed a zombie next to him. Suddenly, a real hellish wolf head came out of the drawing, sucked the dead zombie in, and ate it.

"What the fuck is that?" Finned yelled.

"I don't know. Maybe it's a head of Cerberus?"

"Cerberus? You mean like the three-headed dog that's in Hell?"

"Yeah."

"Wait a second…does that mean _we're in Hell_?"

"I guess so. I think we can escape, though." Finn did not seem to be listening.

"What the fuck? _What the fuck_? We're dead. We're all dead! That explains everything! The zombies, the wolf, the destroyed prison, every single fucking thing! My God! My God!" Weasel grabbed Finn's shoulder.

"Finn! Finn! Look at me. We're gonna get out of here. Trust me. I have a plan. Now, if we're getting out, we have to feed three of these heads. Okay?"

Finn seemed to calm himself and nodded. A zombie hit him from behind and he stabbed it. The head again sucked it up. "That's what you get for hitting an Irish man." Weasel smiled and started killed a zombie. They kept killing until the head was satisfied. Samantha then contacted Weasel.

"Great job, mister Arlington! Now, I suggest you get a new veapon. Zhat pistol vill not last for long. Open zhe door next to you. A surprise vill be avaiting you in zhe varden's office."

"Okay. Thanks. Where is the next head?"

"Zhe infirmary."

"Right."

"Weasel, who are you talking to?"

"I'll tell you when we're out of here…or if we get out of here. Let's just get to the warden's office. The key should be there."

Weasel opened the door to the hall where the warden's office was. He saw that the key was there. It was hanging high and electric. He tried grabbing it but got zapped.

"Ouch! That stings!"

"There's gotta be a way we can get it." He saw a red box on the wall. "Maybe this'll do it." He pulled the switch. He let out a scream and fell.

"Finn!" Weasel yelled. He then saw the key come down and soon after the warden's office opened. Finn then suddenly got back up. "What the fuck happened?"

"I became this ghost thing. I could move fast and jump twice as high. I could power these things to bring the key down and open up doors, and there were doorways of some sort. Can't find them now." They heard the scream of Billy. "Looks like Billy is about find out for himself." Weasel got the key.

"Sal! I got the warden's key, and the warden's office is open!" He called.

"Right! We're that much closer to escaping this hellhole!"

"You have no idea, Sal." Finn muttered. The two went into the office. Weasel found a hellish box in the second room.

"I've seen this box before…gives you weapons, like a slot machine." He opened it, and different weapons started flashing in front of him. All different kinds of weapons. Machine guns, sniper rifles, rocket launchers, old guns, guns he has never seen before, even guns that look like they came from space. It stopped on an LSAT. "This'll keep me in the fight a li'l longer but still, gonna end the same way."

"Stop being so pessimistic, Weasel. It's really annoying. Start boarding up the windows while I use this." Weasel went to the nearest window.

"I recognize the futility of my actions, yet I carry them out regardless."

"You know, mister Arlington, your friend is right. Your pessimistic attitude is really annoying." Samantha said to Weasel. He sighed.

"Hey Weasel! You jealous?" Finn called to Weasel. Weasel looked at Finn. He held the death machine.

"Wow. If only we had that on the outside!" Sal said.

"Where'd you two come from?"

"We found one of the plane parts, just where my boys said it would be." Billy said. "In the showers. First though, where the fuck did you get that?"

"This box, here. Pay it and you get a new shooter."

"How much?" Sal asked.

"Nine hundred fifty points." Weasel said.

"Points? You think this is a fucking game?"

"Sounds crazy, but it's true."

Sal went up to the box, opened it and got two five-sevens. He smiled and said, "There's two things I like to get my hands on. Boobs, and shooters."

"Let me get a try." Billy said. He opened the box and got an AK-47. "Good shooter. I remember killing a Larry Summerstein with this. Remember, Sal?"

"I should know, I told you to do it. Weasel, you have the key. Unlock the gate to the laundry machine. We'll be there in a minute.

"Sure thing. Hello, what do we have here?" Weasel said picking up a motor. "Might as well keep it for now." He left for the showers.

"You still remember the plan, right Finn?"

"Yeah. When we crash, kill Weasel." Sal and Billy smirked. Finn did, too, but he knew that it wouldn't work. They were already in Hell, what would killing Weasel again do?

**That's chapter two, folks! Oh, I have two things to mention: One, chapters will not come often. I upload the next chapters of both of the stories at the same time and my parents limit me to the computer only three times a week, so don't expect an exact schedule. Two, any questions that you may have, leave them in a review and I will answer in the before or after note of the next chapter. Later!**


	3. The First of the Plane Parts

Escaping Alcatraz

Chapter 3

The First of the Plane Parts

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_Weasel_

Weasel went to the showers. He unlocked the gate and pushed the power button on the washing machine. It didn't start. "Shit." He said. He looked behind him. It needed to be powered first. He saw another red box on the other side of the room. He went to it. "Please, please don't hurt." He pulled it. In an instant he felt himself burning as electricity shocked his body. He fell down. Instantly he lost all feeling and the whole world was tinted blue. He could see his body lying on the ground, motionless even though he was moving. He looked at his hands, translucent and tingling with electricity. "So this is afterlife?" He thought to himself. He went to the washing machine. When he moved he felt weightless. He pointed at the power gauge and electricity flew from his hands, powering the gauge. He went back to his body and as soon as he touched it, he was back to his old self. Samantha contacted him.

"I see you have discovered afterlife."

"Yeah, and it's freaking great! I felt weightless, like I could do anything!"

"Vell, appreciate it vhile you can because once you escape, no more afterlife. You vill have to rely on your teammates to save you from zhe zombies. Speaking of vhich…" Zombies started coming through the windows. Weasel shot some with his LSAT, but more zombies were surrounding him. He tried to shoot them, but it looked hopeless. That is until Sal took care of the zombies with a few grenades.

"Where the hell did you get grenades from?"

"I found some in my pockets. Finn and Billy have them too. You probably have some too.

"Oh, did I mention zhat you have grenades?"

"No!"

"What? You don't have any at all?" Sal said.

"No, I mean yes…yes, I have four."

"Are you okay, Weasel?"

"I'm fine. Let's just get the sheets." He went over to the now powered washing machine. He pressed the "open" button. Nothing happened. "Why isn't it working?"

"Maybe you should start it up?"

"Listen to him, Mr. Arlington." Samantha told him. Weasel skeptically pressed the "start cycle" button and the machine began washing the sheets. Suddenly, steam came out of a loose pipe and filled the room, accompanied by demonic laughter. Fire blocked the exits as zombies flooded into the room.

"Great! See what you made me do?" Weasel said to both Samantha and Sal.

"Well stop gawking and start throwing lead!" Sal replied. He shot into the hoard with his dual Five-Sevens. Weasel followed. They were pushed into a corner. When all hope seemed lost the steam cleared and zombies stopped coming in. They took the rest out. Sal got the sheets and they went back up. Finn and Billy were waiting for them.

"Why was there fucking _fire _blocking the entrance?" Billy said.

"Don't ask." Weasel said. "Anyway it doesn't matter now. We got the sheets. What did you two do?"

"We opened the cafeteria and infirmary." Finn said.

"Zhe second head is zhere!" Samantha said.

"Well, let's go. We might find something in the infirmary." Weasel said. They went up the stairs. Weasel opened another door but decided to explore later. They went into the next room, which was filled with bathtubs full of blood. Weasel threw up at the sight.

"Man up, Weasel! Do you realize how much of this stuff I see every day?" Billy said.

"I'm…not…the serial killer…here." He saw something on the floor. It was bright green and filled with what looked like acid. He picked it up and examined it secretly.

"You vill need zhat. Trust me." Weasel listened to Samantha and but it one of the pockets in his jacket. They then proceeded to the next room. Billy leaned up against a wall and lit a cigarette. Weasel was looking for where the second head of Cerberus would appear. Giving up, he shot a zombie. Instantly it fell to the floor and the second head of Cerberus popped out of the wall Billy (who was swearing) was leaning on. It sucked up the zombie and ate it.

"What the fuck? A damn dog just appeared outta that wall! You guys see this too, right?" Sal said.

"Well, whatever it is, keep killing freaks. Something's bound to happen!" He popped the head off of another zombie, killing it. The dog ate it.

* * *

_4 zombies later…_

The dog was satisfied and disappeared. Weasel saw another part, locked inside a case. He opened it and got the part.

"Let's add the parts! The frame of the ship should be on the roof!" He said. He tried to get to the roof, but the door was locked and not even the warden's key could open it. Weasel groaned and went the red box on the wall. He pulled the switch and went into afterlife mode. He went to the roof and powered the gauge to open the door. He went down the stairs and saw a machine called "Deadshot Daiquiri." He powered it and proceeded into the room he opened up when coming up the stairs. Another machine called "Electric Cherry" was there along with the still-working gondola. He powered both and revived himself. "Let's add the parts." They went up to the roof and added the parts. Weasel's acted as a steering mechanism while Sal's acted as the wings (or they _would_, if they could find the rigging).

"Okay, two down, three to go. Let's get to the docks, there probably somethi-" Sal got cut off. He could he pounding coming from the infirmary. The four looked as something came up. "My God! Is that Ferguson?"

* * *

**Sorry for taking so long to upload, guys. A mixture of homework, writer's block, and shortening the chapter because if I wrote until they got the retriever, then this chapter wouldn't be uploaded probably for another week prevented me from uploading this any earlier. Well, time to get started on the next chapter! See ya later!**


	4. Obtaining Hell's Retriever

**Hey everyone! Hell's Retriever time!**

Escaping Alcatraz

Chapter 4

Obtaining Hell's Retriever

The zombie they assumed was Stanley Ferguson came up the stairs and was now on the roof. Deciding to make a move, Finn started firing at it. The Death Machine only angered it. The zombie ran towards Sal and swung at the side of his face. Sal collapsed, clutching his jaw. Billy and Weasel started firing at the zombie. A stray bullet hit its head and it knocked its helmet off. Infuriated, it ripped two smoke grenades out and through them down, clouding the roof in smoke. The three were prepared to shoot anything. Billy heard it behind him. He pulled the pin on one of his grenades, turned around and shoved it into the zombie's mouth. It desperately tried to get it out of its mouth, but when Billy snapped his fingers, its head exploded into undead brain parts.

"Boom." He said. He went over to Sal and helped him up.

"That damn zombie sure packs a punch." He said rubbing his jaw.

"Rub it off. You'll be fine." Billy said. Weasel saw something. It was a floating ammunition box. It was spinning and glowing green. He touched it and instantly heard a demonic voice say "Max ammo!" Instantly Weasel felt his pockets get fuller. He felt what was inside and found bullets for his LSAT and clips for his M1911 as well as four grenades. Then Weasel remembered that he had to get rid of the terrible M1911.

"Hey, I'm going back to the box for a new weapon. Anyone want to come?"

"I wouldn't mind something else. This minigun is getting to heavy to hold." Finn said.

"Go. We're gonna use the gondola. Just call it back when you come back." Sal said. Weasel and Finn went back to the warden's office. Finn opened the box. Weapons cycled through and landed on the MTAR.

"I'll just take this here and phase them all over the fucking wall." Weasel opened the box. It cycled through and landed on the Ray Gun.

"This looks exactly like one of the guns from my outer-space adventure comics!" He said, examining it.

"Weasel, I gotta know something. You said you have a plan to get us out of here. Back to the living world. I want in on this plan. If you tell me, I'll tell you what the others are planning."

"The others are planning something?"

"Yeah."

"What?"

"Tell me your plan and I'll tell you theirs."

"I don't really have a plan. I just…get these ideas. Look, all I know is that Icarus won't work. There has to be another way. I think we should first feed the last head, and I'll continue from there."

"Okay. You better be right."

"Now tell me what Sal and Billy are planning."

"They're planning to kill you. I was gonna help, but then you told me that we're in Hell and that you can get us out. I won't let that happen."

"Heh. The funny thing is that I knew all along. So, are you helping me for self-preservation or friendship?"

"I'll let you decide."

"Oh, zombies are coming."

"Zombies are escaping with us?"

"No. Look behind you." There were zombies coming from the hall. Finn started firing with his new weapon. Weasel fired once and-just as he expected-green circles fired out and took out several zombies. Once they took the rest out, Samantha contacted Weasel again.

"Don't leave yet, Mister Arlington!"

"What, why?"

"What's wrong, Weasel?" Finn asked.

"Uh…nothing. It's just that I barely have any energy pods for my Ray Gun. They give it its ammo."

"There is a part in zhat room zhat goes vith zhe acid container. It looks like a camera. It is in a corner near zhe mystery box." Weasel looked where he was told and found it. _Why would this go with the acid thing? I guess I'll find out soon enough._

The two left the Warden's office. They went up the stairs to the room where the first head was and climbed up to the next floor. Weasel saw a briefcase below him. He thought he might as well get it. It would probably be needed like the acid and camera.

"How did you know I vas going to tell you to get zhat?"

"Instinct."

"You know you don't have to literally speak to me. I can read your zhoughts."

"_All my thoughts?_" Weasel thought to Samantha.

"Yep. You are a very dirty man."

"_Oh shit, a little girl knows about my hooker addiction!"_

"I can hear you!"

"Hey Weasel, you've been acting strange. Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine." He bumped into the Electric Cherry machine.

"What's that?" Finn said.

"It's called Electric Cherry. I powered it when I powered the gondola. Wonder what it does."

"Only one way to find out." Finn spent the necessary two thousand points and a red soda bottle popped out. "A drink? Us Irish could never turn one down…" He popped the cap off with his bare hands and took a swig. "Man. That tasted like sour cherries that were left in the sun for a few days! And now I'm tingling!"

"I might as well buy a bottle. Who knows what it will do?" He gulped down the bottle. Indeed he did feel tingling, but as much as in afterlife. They called the gondola and waited a few seconds until it came back up. A few zombies were coming from behind, which they easily disposed of. They got in the gondola, Weasel paid the seven hundred fifty points, and they were off. Weasel could see Sal and Billy getting overrun by zombies, along with the oxygen tanks, a Tommy gun mounted on a wall, the third wolf's head already out, and an old-fashioned soda machine labeled "Juggernog." The gondola stopped and the two got out.

"It's about time you two showed up!" Sal yelled to them. "Help me kill these fuckers!" Weasel fired into the crowd of zombies. The Ray Gun cleared out a huge chunk of zombies. He cleared out the rest in a few more shots. Sal just looked at Weasel with a what the fuck was that face.

"I was just…and then you…what the hell is that?"

"I know! It looks just like the Ray Gun in my comics! I got it from the Mystery Box!"

"I knew I shoulda went with you. Billy's in the electricity shed. Who knows what else could be in that fucking box?"

"Hey Sal, where'd you get the Tommy?" Finn asked.

"Funny story. I lean up against that wall over there, out of breath see? Next thing I know I get pushed forward and a shooter is on the ground. Seems to come from a chalk drawing on walls."

"Hey! Are you lazy shits gonna help me kill these mother fuckers or are you gonna leave me to die?" Billy yelled to the three.

"We're coming!" Sal said. They were just about to go in when a zombie snuck out and hit Weasel. He turned around and blew its head off with a shot from the Ray Gun. The dog ate it and disappeared.

"Finally! Zhe heads are fed! Hey, zhat rhymes! I'm a poet and I didn't even know it! I did it again! I am on a roll!"

"_What now? Where's the retriever?_"

"In zhe cellar under zhe showers."

"_Great, now I gotta open a lot of damn doors._"

"Didn't I tell you to stop zhat?"

"_Okay. I'll try to stop._"

"Good." Weasel walked in with the others. Billy was with the others, talking.

"Hey guys, what are you talking about?"

"About that shooter you have there." Sal said, pointing to Weasel's Ray Gun.

"Also about two parts we can get here." Billy said.

"And this super drink called Juggernog. It's like steroids or something." Finn added.

"Yeah. The freaks kept hitting me but I refused to be taken down." Billy said. "I think you should all grab a bottle."

"How much?" Weasel asked.

"Uh…two thousand five hundred."

"Well, what are we waiting for? Let's get some." Sal said. They exited the shed, turned right and saw the machine. Sal, Finn, and Weasel each bought a bottle.

"Cheers." Finn said. The clinked bottles and drank. "It tastes fantastic! Like strawberries mixed with alcohol and caramel!"

"Yeah, you're right!" Weasel said. He remembered he had forgotten to reload his Ray Gun. He casually opened the nozzle, tilted it so the old energy pod fell out. Once he slid the new pod in though, electricity surged all around him.

"Woah! What was that?" Finn asked.

"I guess it was Electric Cherry. Try reloading." Weasel said. Finn reloaded and the same effect happened.

"Guess we know why we were tingling. Anyway, how do we get the parts here?"

"You and me go get the first one. Weasel, in order to get the second you have to shut down these panels in afterlife. Understand?" Sal said.

"Okay." Weasel pulled the switch on the afterlife box on the wall and once again became the electric ghost of himself. He powered two panels, went through a secret door, powered the third panel, and revived himself. "Alright, where's the part?"

"Warden's office. We can access it now." Billy said, lighting a cigarette. Weasel remembered seeing one of the parts back in the warden's office. He was unable to get to it though because the door had electricity surging through it. Sal and Finn came back in with the other part…along with a massive group of zombies. Weasel swore and fired into the crowd with his Ray Gun. Billy started casually chucking grenades. Sal was running backwards while simultaneously firing his Tommy gun into the zombies. Finn was holding the part, struggling to get away from the undead. Finn dropped the part when he got behind the others and fired into the crowd with his Death Machine. Soon the zombies were just sacks of rotting flesh and bone on the ground.

"Dammit. We really gotta get out of here. I'm getting too old for this kind of work." Sal said.

"Once we escape this hellhole you can do whatever the hell you want. Just shut up for now." Billy snapped.

"That's the first time I ever saw anyone snap at Sal." Finn whispered to Weasel.

"Yeah. Let's go get the retriever." Weasel replied.

"You sure about getting that thing? Maybe this is all just a cheap way to entertain someone."

"I'm sure about this. Let's go." Weasel opened a door. They found themselves at a spiraling underground staircase that lead back up to the prison. One of the parts was there, which Finn and Billy volunteered to get. Sal and Weasel opened another door. They were right outside the showers. Weasel found a tiny room in a wall. Inside was a beam of orange light with a hellish tomahawk inside it. Weasel grabbed it and examined it. It was great. It felt warm and the sharp edge was made of volcanic rock. Weasel grabbed two more for Finn and Billy. Sal grabbed one, too.

"You did it, Mr. Arlington! You got zhe retriever!"

"_Alright. What now?_"

"You may vant to focus less on me and more on zhe group of about thirty-five zombies zhat are about to enter zhe room." Weasel looked out into the hall. Samantha was right. A huge swarm of zombies was about to enter the little three by five room that he and Sal were trapped in.

**Just a quick announcement. As most of you know I am writing two stories at the same time and uploading the new chapters of those stories at the same time. Well, I find that doing two chapters at once puts a lot of stress on me. I want to keep you guys happy and entertained while making sure you get chapters asap. So I now announce that I will be writing and uploading one chapter at a time to keep my chapters longer while getting them to you sooner. This will take a whole lot of stress off me. I will be uploading chapters for this story after every chapter I do for my other one. See you guys next chapter!**


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